"Time is the only comforter for the loss of a mother" said writer Jane Welsh Carlyle. But I'm not sure I agree.
It's been going on five years since we lost my mom, and I still think about her every single day. There are memories that can be triggered by a TV commercial, a smell or food, and I start to cry. I don't even realize I'm crying until I feel the tears streaming down my cheeks.
Recently a letter arrived from my mom's former employer. They had been trying to locate me for four years. Apparently, there was some unfinished business I needed to take care of that, as executor of her will, I had overlooked.
It was the last thing I expected. Reading that letter, I wondered how it could have taken her employer four years to find me (they had my phone number, and my dad's address on file). It also brought a flood of memories back. After four years, I've started to second guess myself about mom's last days. I wondered if we did everything the way she would have wanted, if she suffered more than she needed to and if she saw me get married to the woman I know she wanted me to spend the rest of my life with.
I felt a wave of different emotions during this "visit" from mom. That's what I call these memories. Sometimes they come to me in dreams, or when I'm looking through old photo albums. Other times, it's something like this letter, that catches me off guard.
I won't go into the content of the letter. Needless to say, I got it resolved, and I think we've finally put an end to that chapter of her life. But the letter and phone calls did manage to bring a little bit of sunshine into the lives of me, and my sister, and I think we'll be able to share some of that with our families.
But isn't that just like a mom...always looking out for her kids, even when they don't realize it or expect it.